Mellow Gold 21-30

21. Here With Me -- Dido
Very danc-y. She's got a great voice.

22. Thunder Road -- Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band
Classic from a classic.

23. Walls -- Tom Petty
From the Soundtrack to "She's the One" by Ed Burns -- great movie featuring Burns and Jennifer Aniston

24. Don't Cry -- Guns & Roses
One of the all-time great power ballads

25. Bad - U2
"If I could, you know I would...If I could, I would...let it go..surrender...dislocate..."

26. Mrs. Potter's Lullaby -- Counting Crows
7+ minutes of vintage Adam Duritz

27. Mother -- Pink Floyd
"Mother do you think they'll drop the bomb?"

28. Just Like Heaven -- The Cure
No one writes a great, brooding pop song like Robert Smith

29. Sick of Goodbyes -- Cracker
Unless it's a great, edgy pop song by David Lowery

30. Hasten Down the Wind -- Warren Zevon
Some great cheese, written by the late, great songwriter...

Bulls!

The Bulls started off the 2006-2007 season with a bang last night, burying the defending champs by 42 in Miami. My fearless prediction 50-55 wins and the conference finals...

Off-Season Magic

Now that the Cubs have Sweet Lou in tow, what to do with 3B Aramis Ramirez, who just filed for free agency? Ramirez seems to have dogged it the first couple of months of the season, when the Cubs needed someone to carry them with Prior, Wood and D. Lee going down, but he padded his stats well the last few months of the season, and ended up with real good numbers. He hit well in crunch time the few previous years -- the question is. I'm betting Piniella won't allow him to dog it but is his production worth the likely $15M per year it will cost?

iPod: The Next Ten Mellow Gold

11. Not Enough Time -- INXS some folks have Barry White to get them feeling romantical I 've got this song by the Michael Hutchence version of INXS

12. How's It Going to Be -- Third Eye Blind ultimate cheese, but quel fromage!

13. Sullivan Street -- Counting Crows "I'm almost drowning in her sea, she's nearly fallen to her knees, it's almost...everything I need..."

14. Closer to Fine -- Indigo Girls particularly like the backing vocals by James Taylor and Jackson Browne

15. 1979 -- Smashing Pumpkins nostalgic pumpkins

16. Beautiful Girl -- INXS another INXS, from the same album "Beautiful girl, stay with me..."

17. Jesus Was an Only Son -- Bruce Springsteen "Well Jesus kissed his mother's hands
Whispered, 'Mother, still your tears, For remember the soul of the universe
Willed a world and it appeared.'"

18. Under Pressure -- Queen with David Bowie still can't forgive Vanilla ice for stealing this beat for Ice Ice Baby

19. Running to Stand Still -- U2 One of several overlooked gems from the Joshua Tree an elegy about addiction

20. Secret Garden -- Bruce Springsteen another romantical song... from Jerry Maguire

iPod Playlists

I'm interested in talking music with any who visit the blog. I've got a couple of different playlists on my iPod; I'll start with "Mellow Gold" and list ten songs each time I do the iPod post, until I've exhausted the playlist. Be interested in recommendations, comparisons, just generally what you think... These are in no particular order, but "Shuffle"

1. She Was the One -- Peter Holsapple
2. If I Had $1,000,000 -- Barenaked Ladies
3. Desert Rose -- Sting
4. Drops of Jupiter -- Train
5. Hurt -- Johnny Cash
6. Bohemian Rhapsody -- Queen
7. Angels -- Peter Holsapple & Chris Stamey
8. Lullaby -- Shawn Mullins
9. Dancing Queen -- ABBA
10. Nothing Man -- Bruce Springsteen

Got introduced to Peter Holsapple in New Orleans at a bar called Carrolton Station. He's played in REM's touring band, and he's a great songwriter...

Hurt is just a great song -- liked Nine Inch Nails original, but Cash's is definitive...

Nothing Man is one of a great album full of songs...

William Carlos Williams

"It is almost impossible to state what one in fact believes, because it is almost impossible to hold a belief and to define it at the same time."
-William Carlos Williams

For some reason, I had the following poem, written by William Carlos Williams
in my head all day:

This Is Just To Say

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold

This is one of my favorite poems, and I memorized it in junior high for an English assignment, but it hadn't crossed my mind in years. Funny how the mind works.

Anywho, here's a couple more of WCW's poems, which I also enjoy:

A Sort of Song

Let the snake wait under
his weed
and the writing
be of words, slow and quick, sharp
to strike, quiet to wait,
sleepless.
— through metaphor to reconcile
the people and the stones.
Compose. (No ideas
but in things) Invent!
Saxifrage is my flower that splits
the rocks.


The Red Wheelbarrow

so much depends
upon

a red wheel
barrow

glazed with rain
water

beside the white
chickens.

Slow Movement

All those treasures that lie in the little bolted box whose tiny space is
Mightier than the room of the stars, being secret and filled with dreams:
All those treasures—I hold them in my hand—are straining continually
Against the sides and the lid and the two ends of the little box in which I guard them;
Crying that there is no sun come among them this great while and that they weary of shining;
Calling me to fold back the lid of the little box and to give them sleep finally.

But the night I am hiding from them, dear friend, is far more desperate than their night!
And so I take pity on them and pretend to have lost the key to the little house of my treasures;
For they would die of weariness were I to open it, and not be merely faint and sleepy
As they are now.

The Full Monty...

Python, that is. A small tribute to their genius from...

The Holy Grail

The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch

King Arthur: How does it... um... how does it work?
Sir Lancelot: I know not, my liege.
King Arthur: Consult the Book of Armaments.
Brother Maynard: Armaments, chapter two, verses nine through twenty-one.
Cleric: [reading] And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths, and carp and anchovies, and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit-bats and large chu...
Brother Maynard: Skip a bit, Brother...
Cleric: And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.

A Witch

Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
Peasant 1: Burn them.
Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
Peasant 1: More witches.
Peasant 2: Wood.
Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
Peasant 3: ...because they're made of... wood?
Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond!
Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
Peasant 1: Bread.
Peasant 2: Apples.
Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
Peasant 1: Cider.
Peasant 2: Gravy.
Peasant 3: Cherries.
Peasant 1: Mud.
Peasant 2: Churches.
Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck.
Sir Bedevere: ...Exactly. So, logically...
Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
Sir Bedevere: And therefore...
Peasant 2: ...A witch!

(Lack of) Choice 2006

Was talking to Mrs. Tarzan (Jane?) recently, about the lack of excitement the 2006 elections are generating for me. Here in Illinois, we have a choice between two of the Seven Dwarfs, Sleazy (Governor Blagojevich) and Angry (the un-gubernatorial Judy Barr Topinka). Sleazy, is just that -- a "lite" version of the equally sleazy William Jefferson Clinton, whose policies I by and large agreed with, but whose ethically challenged leadership was lacking -- although Blago's sleazy deals largely with family and friends accepting questionable payments, kickbacks, rather than strange tricks with cigars. Also, with the Gov., none of the charges have yet to result in any indictment.

The problem with Angry is that she refuses to disown the sleazy Republican establishment in Illinois (she's a disciple of those that ennabled George Ryan) and she's running a campaign like the grumpy old man on your block who threatened to steal your baseball if it landed on his lawn when you were a kid (and did to me, at least once). Her policies are also far from the type I can get behind. Unfortunately, there's no real third party candidate to speak of.

So, what to do about the gubernatorial election in November? I've actually considered refusing to vote for governor given the choices, but given my belief exercising my right to vote, I'm more likely to vote with the uninspiring Dems than the equally uninspiring Republicans, because, I figure, go with the party that brought you to the dance, all other things being equal. Or maybe I'll write in "Abe Lincoln". Or Franklin Roosevelt. Or Diamond Joe Quimby.

What I'm Watching

The new fall season has been solid -- I'm TIVOing the following at my house

Prison Break -- currently on hiatus after 4 episodes (World Series on Fox) But the wait has been worth it

Vanished -- it stinks, but I'm hooked. Shame it's going the way of the Big Bands

Studio 60 Live on the Sunset Strip -- the West Wing meets Saturday night live. Who knew Matthew Perry could do drama?

30 Rock -- only one episode so far... we'll see

Lost -- is driving me nuts -- how stupid can the prinicipals be? After living on the island for two years, you'd think they'd have learned not to trust strangers...

Kidnapped -- has been relegated to Saturday nights, and will apparently run its course after 13 episodes -- which stinks, because it's excellent, particularly Timothy Hutton.

The Office -- rocks. What an ensemble.

Grey's Anatomy -- appeals to the Soap Opera-y part of me. McDreamy and now McSteamy.
Tarzan Joe's not gay, but these guys are hot!

The Nine -- haven't seen it yet, but it's on TIVO


And the piece de resistance -- 24, which won't open until January...

Where to Begin?

Hello. I'm Tarzan Joe Wallis and it's been 6 months since my last blog. Quite frankly I feel like a recovering blog-a-holic. I'm going to try and take it a bit slower this time around to avoid blog burnout. Easiest place to begin is probably where I finished off last time, hope again springs eternal with the Cubs' imminent hiring of Lou Piniella to light a fire under some dead wood on the team. I don't expect miracles, but quite frankly, the Cubs could have been a .500 team had they been able to do the things Little Leaguers are taught, like catch the ball, throw the ball, watch and listen to your coach when you're running the bases. Don't think that fundamentals will be a problem for Sweet Lou. He'll tear some of the Cubs a new one if they persist in their wayward behaviors...

Jacque & Carlos

The ever-loyal Funky was curious about my response to Bleacher Bums booing Jacque Jones yesterday. Funky is against. My take is a bit different. Jones came here for more money, pure and simple. So any complaint he has about loyalty is suspect to begin with. Add in the fact that Cubs fans come through the turnstiles to the tune of more than 3+ million a year -- no mean feat given the fact that Wrigley seats barely 40,000 and the Cubs haven't even sniffed a Series since 1945 and I'm almost ready to boo Jones myself. The real kicker, however, is his performance merited a verbal butt-kicking. Twice, not once, but twice, the batter in front of him (Matt Murton) walked on four straight pitches. What does Jones, who is in a slump, do? He swings at the first pitch both times, and pops out. So long as the fans weren't using profanity or calling out Jones' family members, I'm fine with the boos. Jones also made things worse by waiting until after the game, after he had hit the game winning homerun (which fans gave him his props for) to call out Cubs fans. Why in the world would you moan about it after you won the game? He's asking to be booed now.

The other dunce of the game, is Carlos Zambrano, who is lucky he didn't end up on the DL with splinters after breaking a bat over his leg after whiffing. What is he, 10? Many fans like his shows of emotion, arguing that he feeds off his antics. The problem is, when things are going lousy, he loses focus and acts unprofessionally. , by doing things like showing up his teamates. And we true blue fans wonder why we're reaching a Century of Futility?

And the Suffering Continues...

Derek Lee, Cubs star first baseman will be out 8-10 weeks with two broken bones in his wrist after colliding with Rafael Furcal in a game last night. Not good Cubs fans...

My Other Favorite TV Attorney, Lionel Hutz

Strangely enough, Phil Hartman was both Lionel Hutz and and Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer...

Love the Simpsons -- which is where these quotes come from...

Pfft. Doctors. Doctors are idiots! There is no telling what type of permanent injuries he might have. You might have to wait on him hand and foot for the rest of his natural life. That's the down side. Now here is the good part. You can ching ching ching cash in on this tragedy.

Mr. Simpson, the state bar forbids me from promising you a big cash settlement. But just between you and me, I promise you a big cash settlement.

Lionel Hutz, court-appointed attorney. I'll be defending you on the charge of... Murder One! Wow! Even if I lose, I'll be famous!

Judge: Case dismissed!
Hutz: Your Honor... Do I still get paid?

Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of fraudulent advertising since my suit against the film, "The Never-Ending Story".
Homer: So. Do you think I have a case?
Hutz: Homer, I don't use the word "hero" very often, but you are the greatest hero in American history.

Hutz: Now don't you worry, Mrs. Simpson, I - uh-oh. We've drawn Judge Snyder.
Marge: Is that bad?
Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me, since I accidently ran over his dog. Actually, replace `accidently' with `repeatedly', and replace `dog' with `son'.


Bart: Mr. Hutz when I grow up I want to be a lawyer just like you.
Hutz: Good for you, son. If there's one thing America needs, it's more lawyers. Can you imagine a world without lawyers?

Hutz: I move for a bad court thingy.
Judge: You mean a mistrial?
Hutz: Right!! That's why you're the judge and I'm the law-talking guy.
Judge: You mean the lawyer?
Hutz: Right.

Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer

In a nod to Jeff C-Win, as well as my chosen profession, I give you Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer, from Saturday Night Live

"He used to be a caveman,
but now he's a lawyer.
Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer!"

Transcript 1
Transcript 2

"Your world frightens and confuses me! Sometimes the honking horns of your traffic make me want to get out of my BMW.. and run off into the hills, or wherever.. Sometimes when I get a message on my fax machine, I wonder: "Did little demons get inside and type it?" I don't know! My primitive mind can't grasp these concepts. But there is one thing I do know - when a man like my client slips and falls on a sidewalk in front of a public library, then he is entitled to no less than two million in compensatory damages, and two million in punitive damages. Thank you."

Even the Onion Has a Bead on the Cubs

Check out this article on the Cubs from America's Finest News Source, The Onion, titled, "Dusty Baker Not Worried About Cubs' Hot Start". Here's a "quote" from Dusty in the article, "The guys are in a bit of a groove right now, but they'll snap out of it," Baker said. "It's early yet. There's still plenty of time to get back off track and give the fans the kind of season they've come to know and expect."

Play Ball!

Cubs rolled the Reds today, 16-7. While Carlos Zambrano's control was shaky, the hitters were bashing the ball, and doing the little things like sacrificing, bunt(!) hits, and running the bases well. 1-0 after 1. Come on Woody and Prior!

Hope Springs Eternal

Cubs broke camp yesterday with a winning spring training record, which past history suggests is an indicator that they will finish above .500. Not gonna predict playoffs, but I will say they'll be competitive -- probably 83-79 this year, better if they get 50-60 starts from Woody and Prior. They've got a lot to prove after the Sox won it all last year, and they're flying under the radar again after crazy predictions of World Series glory the past couple of years. Here's hoping, although I predict we'll be through 98 years of futility after the season.

Take the Money and Run

Check out this one. Soccer refs in Nigeria have been told it's cool for them to take bribes, but to be fair anyway. Yeah. This'll work. Like the Edsel. I particularly like the quote, "Referees should only pretend to fall for the bait, but make sure the result doesn't favor those offering the bribe."

Funky

To answer J C-win's ?, Funky is Paul, a good friend of mine from high school, who now resides with his wife in the great state of Minnesota, which allows him to be a double threat to the hated White Sox -- a Cubs fan and a Twins fan...

Another Reason I Don't Like Cats

Have you heard this one, about Lewis, the insane Connecticut bushwacking house cat? Animal control officials in Connecticut have issued a restraining order against the cat for stealth attacks on neighbors, friends and even the Avon Lady (well, she at least probably had it coming). Seems to be a bit o' species discrimination going on. If this was a dog, it would have been destroyed. But because cats have a higher proportion of equally insane owners (you never hear about the crazy old lady with 100 dogs, do you?), the cat gets off with a questionably enforceable rap. And Lady Justice weeps...

Bracketology Update

Man is it ugly in my NCAA brackets. The annual ritual of tearing them up while cursing under my breath (only mildly) lasted a little longer into the tournament this year, but I, like a lot of other March Madness-keteers, owe our pain (and some joy) to George Mason for knocking out prohibitive favorite U Conn. Speaking as a true Cubs fan -- there's always next year!

Cool It Now!

In a nod to Jeff C-win -- they're back, or should I say, Bobby is back! Mr. Telephone Man, is there something wrong with my line? Not at all baby, New Edition to re-unite for one night only. !

And the Slope Gets Slipperier

Not a good day concerning Iraq. The Administration finally copped to the obvious -- that U.S. forces will be in Iraq past the end of the Bush Administration, with no end in sight.

Personal Responsibility?

Whatever happened to the idea that people should be held accountable for their actions? All indications are that plaintiffs' attorneys are ready to launch a full-out attack on the fast food industry, blaming Mickey D's among others, for the fattening of America. Can't we just say no? I've got some chunk to me, but that's my fault -- it's my enjoyment of all things sweet and relative lack of exercise that has made me delightfully love-handlely, not the fast food or sweet snack industry. Certainly, if there's some element of fraud, or danger, such as McDonald's only recently disclosing that its fries contain wheat and milk (allergens to many) as well as being wrong in its caloric count -- it's reasonable for consumers to rely on such information from providers. But for people to say that they are obese because they have a proclivity for Big Macs and somehow didn't know Big Macs were bad for them -- that's like smoking -- at some point, it's just not reasonable. Here's hoping that the courts recognize the difference, and refuse to allow the system to be abused by potentially frivolous claims.

R.I.P Coach Ray

Former DePaul University Basketball coach Ray Meyer died at 92 today. Coach Ray presided over the golden age of DePaul hoops, and coached George Mikan, Mark Aguirre, Dave Corzine and Terry Cummings among others. DePaul made the Final Four in 1979 under Coach Ray and was ranked No. 1 for a number of weeks in the late 70s and early 80s, only to disappoint with early NCAA exits. He was a class act, and I had the privilege of attending his basketball camp as an 8th grader. He loved kids, loved to coach and was a great teacher. Godspeed.

98 Years, Soon to Be 99

So let's take stock of the Cubs halfway through spring training. Kerry Wood -- rehabbing his shoulder and knee. Derrick Lee -- sore shoulder requiring a visit to a specialist. Mark Prior -- shoulder "stiffness" sounding strangely similar to last year's elbow "stiffness" which cost him the first month of the season. I feel like the Job of baseball cheering for these guys...

It's Time

My favorite event of the sporting year approaches -- March Madness, the Big Dance, the NCAAs. Particularly awesome are this Thursday and Friday, with 16 games each day, 12 straight hours of non-stop thrills and bracket bustin' goodness. I'm certain I'm not alone when I say these two days should be a national holiday. I can hardly wait to fill out multiple brackets!

Spring Is In The Air

Got spring fever here in Chicagoland -- the mercury has cracked 50 the past few days and it's pushing past 60 today -- we'll have another few days of this before we plunge back into the 30s. The first days of 50+ weather are always superb -- it seems like 70s after being stuck inside for so long. It's amazing what weather like this can do for your morale after the long winter -- I'm ready for baseball, shorts, and hanging out outside with the family and our neighbors.

Whither Das Cubs?

It's been real quiet out in Arizona, which may be a good thing after all of the whispering and hand wringing about Kerry Wood and Mark Prior. Woody appears to be set to start putting pressure on his cleaned up knee, and Prior is set to throw in a Cactus League game next week. Still, as a Cub fan, I'm fully expecting Wood's arm to fall off about 1-2 starts into the season, and for Prior to get hit by something about 5-6 starts into the season. It's probably a good thing that the Cubs have such trouble winning, as a I believe it was Nostradamus who made the following prophecy:

When the little bears from the windy place raise the flag of triumph, know ye that the end of days come.

Time Running Out for Ex-Governor?

I've been following former governor George Ryan's trial with much interest. Closing arguments are scheduled to end tomorrow and the it will be interesting to see what the jury does with the evidence. The federal government has produced a case largely based on circumstantial evidence -- but the circumstances are pretty damning -- less than $7,000 in bank withdrawals over his time in the governor's mansion -- strange for a man who loved the high life, sweetheart deals with political allies, probable fundraising violations, thwarted ethical investigations and the coup de grace, what Ryan knew about the bribes for licenses scandal that played a part in the fiery death of a minister's children (though rhis has been glossed over so as not to inflame the jury). Ryan's defense team has pounded on the fact that the governor has been unfairly and maliciously persecuted by the government that the circumstances of the disputed events, while seemingly damning, are in fact merely coincidental, and that the governor is in fact a man of high character, evidenced by his freeze on the death penalty in Illinois shortly before his term of office ended.

I think he's guilty. I find it impossible to believe that a man who not only survived, but thrived in the world of Illinois politics for 40 years was a mere dupe of his benefactors and political allies. Guilty or not, it's unfortunate that his legacy will be one of corruption instead of taking a necessary stand on the death penalty.

Basketball

I usually play hoops on Wednesday night at the church I go to with an over 30 crowd. I played last night for the first time in about a month -- I expected to be extremely rusty, but actually was en fuego -- I could do no wrong offensively or defensively. Boy it's fun to have a few games like that! I'm not a good player, but competitive in the crowd I play with. I've noticed that when I take a few weeks off, my first week back is usually pretty good -- it's generally downhill after that. Maybe I'll take a couple weeks off before I play again to test the theory...

Karl Rahner

Karl Rahner, S.J.'s, interpretation and expansion of Catholic theology influenced the Second Vatican Council and is considered essential to a modern understanding of Catholic faith. Rahner's theology is also rejected by many dogmatic Catholics for his theory concerning the "Anonymous Christian" -- non-believers who may attain salvation through the grace of God and their earthly works. I have never been comfortable with the idea that moral, spiritual people who live good lives will be denied heaven. Nor, however, had I been able to square that idea with the gospel teachings that the way to heaven is through Jesus alone. When I studied Rahner in high school and college philosophy, it suddenly made sense.

Here are some of his thoughts:

Anonymous Christianity means that a person lives in the grace of God and attains salvation outside of explicitly constituted Christianity... Let us say, a Buddhist monk... who, because he follows his conscience, attains salvation and lives in the grace of God; of him I must say that he is an anonymous Christian; if not, I would have to presuppose that there is a genuine path to salvation that really attains that goal, but that simply has nothing to do with Jesus Christ. But I cannot do that. And so, if I hold if everyone depends upon Jesus Christ for salvation, and if at the same time I hold that many live in the world who have not expressly recognized Jesus Christ, then there remains in my opinion nothing else but to take up this postulate of an anonymous Christianity.

In the torment of the insufficiency of everything attainable we eventually learn that here, in this life, all symphonies remain unfinished.

How often I have found that we grow to maturity not by doing what we like, but by doing what we should. How true it is that not every 'should' is a compulsion, and not every 'like' is a high morality and true freedom.

Grace can and does have a history.

In death the relationship we have with the world is not abolished, but is rather for the first time completed.

Here Comes Trouble

Kerry Wood, currently rehabbing his shoulder, has arthroscopic knee surgery set for Tuesday. Cubs claim it's no big deal, but it's all a big deal with Woody. Says here that a problem with the wheels leads to continued problems with Wood's arm mechanics as he tries to compensate for a weak knee by overthrowing with that arm across the body motion. Not an encouraging start to 2006...

Millenium

Got the first season of Chris Carter's show Millenium (spelling?) from Netflix. I remember watching this show at times when it came out and liking it, but I wasn't a regular viewer -- it's pretty dark, and at the time I was a devotee of Carter's other show, the X-Files. I missed out is all I can say. The premise is that the lead character, Frank Black (no not from the Pixies) is a retired FBI profiler of serial killers, who hangs it up because he's too good at what he does -- he actually has visions of what the killer sees (a la Will Graham from Red Dragon). The twist is that he's been contacted to come out of retirement by a "consultant" group called the Millenium Group, who assists the authorities on particularly baffling serial killer cases. The Millenium Group, however, believes that these killers, rather than being random psychopaths, are driven by the forces of hell on earth (i.e., Satan) bent on bringing about the apocalypse of Revelations. May sound out there, but it's compelling...

The Squid and The Whale

Caught this indie flick over the weekend. Good movie, but tough to watch. It's about a family breaking up after years of the husband and wife being lousy to each other. It shows how the parents and their two sons suffer, particularly by making bad choices it seems. There were parts that were truly funny and bits that were hard to watch because they were raw and painful -- the younger son (who's pre-teen) acts out by drinking, smoking and something more politely reserved for private conversation. Good acting, particularly by the boys who play the sons. It's definitely not for delicate sensibilities (like Mom! :))

Here We Go Again

What would spring training be without Cubs pitchers on the shelf? Kerry Wood is still rehabbing, and Mark Prior is rumored to have shoulder problems.

Krushchev

I'm currently reading a biography of Nikita Krushchev by William Taubman. I find Khrushchev as fascinating as any historical figure of the 20th century, as a man, a politician, a statesman, and a Cold War leader. The man is as complex and contradictory as they come both in his motives and his methods. More to come as I get farther into the book...

Hiatus Over

Taken a little longer posting break than I like to. It's been busy around the Tarzan household and with the Tarzan business. Just finished a history of the Middle East written by a former BBC (I think) correspondent. It was concise, well written and contained a wealth of information about the roots of the current conflict between the U.S. and Europe, Arab and Persian nations and Islam. Colonialism and neo-colonialism, combined with Islam, explain much about the current problems the U.S. and Europe are experiencing in the Middle East. It also discusses the roots of Islamic fundamentalism and terrorism as an accepted weapon against the West. It's a great book that gives one a lot to think about in the modern context.

The GAO Preliminary Statement On Katrina

This preliminary report from the GAO takes the federal government (particularly FEMA) to task for massive failures in preparation, planning, and response to Hurricane Katrina. What's chilling is the implication the report makes for our readiness for any new potential terrorist attack...

McSweeney's Does 24

Snippets from

"About Me"
on Jack Bauer's Friendster Profile.
BY JACK RUENPRAPAN

Catch the full article at the link to McSweeney's Internet Tendency

- - - -

I don't have a lot of time to explain right now, but you're going to have to trust me.

During my years of covert government service, I have gone through hell and back. Yes, I am proud to have served my country, helping to avoid many horrific tragedies. Rules are meant to be followed, but I have a history of insubordination. While the methods I employ may seem harsh, I always have one goal in mind: saving lives. In the process, I have had to make some tough decisions, often within seconds, in order to avert disaster.

To my friends: I'm sorry for not telling you everything. It's not that I don't trust you, but we are operating on a strict need-to-know basis. But when I'm in a jam, I hope I can count on you. Whether it's illegally hacking passwords of suspected terrorist financiers or keeping your mouth shut about my smack habit, I really appreciate everything. And if you ever find yourself unavoidably chained to a weapon of mass destruction counting down to zero, you know I'm the first one there with an ax. You can even use my belt to stop the bleeding while I radio Division for help. Sorry I can't stick around to accompany you to the emergency room, but there's still work that needs to be done, so get me that chopper. And set up a perimeter right away.

To my enemies: If I need information from you, seconds count. So apologies in advance if I have to break your thumbs or threaten to kill your family; I empathize with you. Believe me, I've been tortured plenty of times myself, and I know interrogation ain't no picnic. Please listen to me very carefully: I will DO WHATEVER IT TAKES to stop this assassination/nuclear bomb/horrible karaoke.

- - - -

Been A Long Week...

Haven't blogged for almost a week -- between work, considering new work options (got a couple of interviews next week to explore some new possibilties), illness and a major wireless router breakdown requiring the crack help of the Geek Squad (they don't actually roll like the Mod Squad, which was disappointing), I haven't had much time or accessiblility to the Century of Futility.

First, work. Week started with a bang -- new contracts, a new project with a colleague, and plenty of closings over the next three weeks, and ended with a whimper -- likely lost one contract because the appraisal came back way too low, and lost my condo deal, which will entail a future hit. Not too pleased with the way the day went as I write this.

Second, new work. Interviewing with a headhunter on Monday, and for a position with a firm in Wheaton. Interested in seeing what's out there.

Third, illness. My little man caught a cold Tuesday and was up all night with breathing problems and a fever -- he'd cough, cough, cough and wake himself up -- he couldn't have gotten more than two hours of sleep all night. He went to the doctor Wednesday, and has bounced back nicely, but the hardest thing for me as a parent is when I'm powerless to help (like when Sammo can't breathe), particularly because my kids are still young enough to think Mom and Dad can fix anything. Then, on Thursday, my wife calls me. From the hospital. Seems she had a bad dizzy spell at work that she thought may have been an allergic reaction. She's fine, thankfully, but again, there's the powerless problem.

Fourth, Geek Squad. While Sammo was getting sick, so was our computer system. The wireless router somehow got unconfigured (deconfigured, discombobulated?) completely shutting down the home office. Which happens to be THE OFFICE. Thankfully, Geek Squad rolled to the rescue for a total of $129.00

That's the week in a nutshell. Stay tuned for next week's episode, same Bat-time, same Bat-channel.

The "New" Supreme Court

I've been purposely holding off commenting on the selections of John Roberts and Samuel Alito to the high court -- mostly because I wanted to see how the process played out. The "vetting" process by the Senate is badly flawed. The fact of the matter is, I'm most interested in knowing how a particular judge intereprets the law -- not in their personal politics. As a matter of course, most judges put their personal beliefs aside in reaching a decision on a case, and there was clearly no evidence that either Justice Roberts or Justice Alito would use their new role to advance private political agendas. While a judge's interpretation of an unprecedented case may be informed by their background, most judges who make it to courts of appeal or the federal bench at all are solid jurists who apply the law, not their opinions to the case. This is why the Republicans missed badly on Justices Kennedy and Souter, and why the Democrats made themselves look like fools when they spent their time pontificating during the confirmation hearings of the new Justices -- they failed to fully appreciate (or care) that candidates for the highest bench in the land are by and large going to interpret the law as it exists -- not as they wish it to be. Legislating from the bench is the quickest way to stall your career as a judge (Justice Scalia being the obvious exception). So while it's way too early to uncover any trends from Justices Roberts and Alito, I'm not too concerned that they'll be listening to a political party rather than the Constitution in deciding cases. They seem much more pragmatic than dogmatic.

Karl Barth

Here are the thoughts of yet another significant theologian -- Swiss born Karl Barth. Many consider Barth to be the most inlfuential theologian since Thomas Aquinas. Here's a sampling of his thoughts:

[God] is not deaf, he listens; more than that, he acts. He does not act in the same way whether we pray or not. Prayer exerts an influence upon God's action, even upon his existence. That is what the word 'answer' means. ... The fact that God yields to man's petitions, changing his intentions in response to man's prayer, is not a sign of weakness. He himself, in the glory of his majesty and power, has so willed it.

Joy is the simplest form of gratitude.

Man can certainly flee from God... but he cannot escape him. He can certainly hate God and be hateful to God, but he cannot change into its opposite the eternal love of God which triumphs even in his hate.


Laughter is the closest thing to the grace of God


Jews have God's promise and if we Christians have it, too, then it is only as those chosen with them, as guests in their house, that we are new wood grafted onto their tree.

Religion is the possibility of the removal of every ground of confidence except confidence in God alone

Grace must find expression in life, otherwise it is not grace.

Men have never been good, they are not good and they never will be good

It may be that when the angels go about their task praising God, they play only Bach. I am sure, however, that when they are together en famille they play Mozart.

All sin has its being and origin in the fact that man wants to be his own judge. And in wanting to be that, and thinking and acting accordingly, he and his whole world is in conflict with God. It is an unreconciled world, and therefore a suffering world, a world given up to destruction.

Super Seahawks! (Meaning Steelers Win!)

Going with the Seahawks for the Super Bowl win -- thus guaranteeing a Steelers victory in the game, which should make all the Pry-wins in and around the 'Burgh joyful! I think it will be a good game -- the teams match up well, and if Shaun Alexander can get going, the Seahawks will make it tough on the Steeltowners. No other analysis -- just going with my streak of (bad) luck to bring it home for the Terrible Towelers...

Celluloid You Can't Refuse

Watched The Road to Perdition the other night -- one of my favorite gangster films. Every actor in it hits his mark perfectly -- Tom Hanks, Paul Newman, Jude Law, Daniel Craig (the new James Bond!) and as Tom Hanks' son, Tyler Hoechlin. Just a great movie about an "honorable" hit man who gets involved in a double cross and has to go on the lam to protect his son. Got me thinking about my favorite mob movies of all time -- the ones I've seen, in no particular order...

A Bronx Tale -- DeNiro, Chazz Palmintieri, a father's battle with the Mob for the soul of his son...

Bugsy -- Vegas, Baby, Vegas! And Warren Beatty. And Ben Kingsley... And Annette Bening

Carlito's Way -- Al Pacino in all his bluster as a "reformed" Latin gangster who just keeps getting pulled back in

Donnie Brasco -- Johnny Depp as a federal mole who nearly joins the mob before he beats them -- and destroys Al Pacino in the process

The Freshman -- Marlon Brando and Matthew Broderick in just a great comedic riff on the Godfather

The Godfather -- The saga of the Corleone family begins -- Brando, Pacino, James Caan, Robert Duvall. A flawless movie...

The Godfather Part II -- The saga of the Corleone family is complete (forget III) -- Brando, Pacino, DeNiro, Duvall, Diane Keaton. Francis Ford Coppola makes a flawless sequel

Goodfellas -- DeNiro, Joe Pesci and Ray Liotta; Pesci in his career-making role. Brutal but you just can't avert your eyes.

Johnny Dangerously -- Michael Keaton pre-Batman. Hi-lar-i-ous.

Miller's Crossing -- The Cohen brothers do the Irish mob noir-style. Gabriel Byrne in his best role (Usual Suspects is a close second), Albert Finney, Marcia Gay Harden and John Turturro

Once Upon a Time in America -- DeNiro and James Woods in Sergio ("Spaghetti Western") Leone's last film about the rise of the New York mob.

On the Waterfront -- Brando again with Karl Malden and Rod Steiger. One of the greatest movie soliloquys of all time by Brando's Terry Malloy: "You don't understand. I could've had class. I could've been a contender. I could've been somebody instead of a bum, which is what I am..."

The Untouchables -- Sean Connery's Oscar-winning turn as cynical Chicago cop Jimmy Malone. Kevin Costner as Elliot Ness, Andy Garcia, Charles Martin Smith and DeNiro again, as Al Capone. Brian DePalma's best film.

The Road to Perdition

A Natural History of Peace

An interesting article from Foreign Affairs on whether human beings are innately peaceful or war-like. A hopeful article that acknolwedges that "[c]ontrary to what was believed just a few decades ago, humans are not "killer apes" destined for violent conflict, but can make their own history."

Hamas and the Future of Palestine

What to say about the ascendency of a terrorist organization to political power? Democracy should prevail in the Middle East, but what to make of the fact that the Palestinians have chosen -- and chose the political arm of Hamas, whose charter advocates the destruction of Israel? I think the rub here is not to look at this decision by Palestinians as a vote solely in favor of terrorism. Hamas leaders' have avoided the corruption that plagues Fatah, the organization built by Yasser Arafat. Hamas has also done a much better job in creating social services and taking care of the impoverished Palestinian population than Fatah.

At the same time, how can America support the legitimate results of democracy and encourage continued efforts at state-building in the West Bank and Gaza Strip while condemning the terrorist acts of Hamas, which remains unrepentant for its use of violence and terror and advocation of Israel's destruction, and continues to refuse to rule out the continued use of violence to achieve its aims? The key may be to be pragmatic. Recognize the value of democracy as a legitimate end in itself, even when the result is unfavorable to our interests. Refuse to accept the platform and actions of terror sponsored by Hamas and take the actions necessary to deal with (and prevent) such acts. Many observers opine that Hamas may moderate its views by becoming part of the system -- much in same way the IRA did in Northern Ireland (albeit, it remains a work in progress) when its political wing, Sinn Fein was able to join the national government. This situation remains a thorny problem that bears careful observing and the use of pragmatism.

Congressman Seuss

Just got this off of Solosez e-mail, an ABA resource for solo practitioners. don't know who wrote it, but it's great!

That Abramoff!
That Abramoff!

I do not like that Abramoff!
"Would you like to play some golf?"
I do not want to play some golf.
I do not want to, Abramoff.

"We could fly you there for free.
Off to Scotland, by the sea."
I do not want to fly for free.
I don't like Scotland by the sea.
I do not want to play some golf.
I do not want to, Abramoff.

"Would you, could you, take this bribe?
Could you, would you, for the tribe?"
I would not, could not, take this bribe.
I could not, would not, for the tribe.

"If we strong-armed corporations
Into giving you donations?
They'd be funneled to your PAC.
Would you then cut us some slack?"
I would not, could not, cut you slack.
I do not care about my PAC.
I do not want to play some golf.
I do not want to, Abramoff.

"A plane! A plane! A plane! A plane!
Would you, could you, for a plane?"
I could not, would not, for a plane.
Not for a bribe, not for the tribe.
Not for donations from corporations.
Not for my PAC, not for some slack.
Not from any schmoe named Jack.

"Would you help us buy some ships
Perfect for quick gambling trips?
Talk to people in the know
For a little quid pro quo?

Oh come now, don't be a snob.
Let us give your wife a job."
I will not help you buy some ships.
I do not wish for gambling trips.
My wife does not need a job
Even if she is a snob.

We do not like bribes, can't you see?
Why won't you just let me be?

"You do not like bribes, so you say.
Try them, try them, and you may.
Try them and you may, I say."
Jack. If you will let me be

I will try them, then you'll see.
Say.... I do like playing golf!
I like it, I do, Abramoff!
I do like Scotland by the sea.
It's such a thrilling place to be!

And I will take this bribe.
And I will help the tribe.
And I will take donations
From big corporations.

And I will help you buy some ships.
And I will take quick gambling trips.
Say, I'll give anyone the shaft
As long as it involves some graft!

I do so like playing golf!
Thank you! Thank you,
Abramoff!

Paul Tillich

A modern Christian philospoher who gets his props here:

Here's a brief biography from Wikipedia

And some memorable quotes...

Anger is a noble infirmity; the generous failing of the just; the one degree that riseth above zeal, asserting the prerogative of virtue.

Being religious means asking passionately the question of the meaning of our existence and being willing to receive answers, even if the answers hurt.

Decision is a risk rooted in the courage of being free.

Doubt isn't the opposite of faith; it is an element of faith.

Faith consists in being vitally concerned with that ultimate reality to which I give the symbolical name of God. Whoever reflects earnestly on the meaning of life is on the verge of an act of faith.

I hope for the day when everyone can speak again of God without embarrassment.

Language... has created the word "loneliness" to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word "solitude" to express the glory of being alone.

Our language has wisely sensed the two sides of being alone. It has created the word loneliness to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word solitude to express the glory of being alone.

Religion is the state of being grasped by an ultimate concern, a concern which qualifies all other concerns as preliminary and which itself contains the answer to the question of a meaning of our life.

The courage to be is the courage to accept oneself, in spite of being unacceptable.

The first duty of love is to listen.

There is no love which does not become help.

The Constant Gardener (Spoiler Alert)

We watched the Constant Gardener last night, a political thriller based on a John LeCarre novel, starring Ralph Fiennes and Rachel Wiesz. The movie is about the relationship between a career man in Britain's foreign service and his impassioned and indelicate (when it comes to behaving diplomatically) wife. The wife becomes embroiled in a dangerous game pitting her and an African doctor against big pharmaceutical companies who are testing drugs on the local population in Kenya, without regard for the side effects. The husband is unaware of this until his wife is murdered; she wanted to spare him the details to try and shelter his career from potential blowback. Instead, he tries to finish what his wife started -- exposing the pharmaceutical bean counting of African lives (treated as expendable in the pursuit of higher profit) and the British Foreign Service's complicity in it.

Great movie, and a typical sterling performance from Ralph Fiennes, who is without a doubt one of the more gifted actors performing. The only problem I had was with the ending, or rather with the ending for Ralph Fiennes. Once Fiennes has arranged for the public outing of the Foreign Service and pharmaceutical companies' roles in the deaths of its African test subjects, Fiennes goes to the scene of his wife's murder, knowing full well he'll be murdered too, without any explanation of his motives that ring true. While he clearly is affected by the loss of his wife, he doesn't seem the suicidal type, and he doesn't seem to be seeking some Rambo-esque confrontation with his wife's killers. Just didn't get it...

Playoff Picks -- The Three-quel

2-2 last week, making a 5-3 postseason record. Not surprised about the Bears, but blown away by the dominance of the Steelers -- it wasn't as close as the score, thanks to some interesting refereeing...

NFC Championship Game

Panthers at Seahawks

Panthers are clearly road warriors, and their defense is real solid. The Seahawks, however, have Shaun Alexander back, and were able to score 20 on another good defense without him. If Alexander gets 100, Seahawks win, and I'm betting he'll get there. Seahawks to go Super.


AFC Championship Game

Steelers at Broncos

Going to play the percentages this weekend. No 6th seed in the playoffs has ever gone to the Super Bowl. Bill Cowher is 1-4 in AFC Championship games. Broncos are nearly a carbon copy of the Steelers -- run, run run, QBs who manage a game, but can make plays when asked, solid O and D-lines, fast, playmaking LBs, and solid secondaries. Broncos in a close one.

What Not To Do When Offered Gum -- A Refresher Brought to You By The Onion

Your Offer Of Gum Seems Rather Disingenuous

By Roger Barney
January 17, 2006 | Issue 42•03
Your Offer Of Gum Seems Rather Disingenuous

Can you indulge me with a few moments of your time? I want to address something that happened a minute ago. We were talking, quite civilly, and then you reached into your pocket and pulled out a pack of Wrigley's Eclipse. One of their "new and improved" peppermints. You took a piece for yourself, and then—for reasons I can't quite understand—offered me a piece.

I stammered a bit, not knowing what to say, but managed to issue a polite refusal. As you will recall, I was chewing a piece of Fruit Stripe gum, something I often like to do after a large lunch.

Here's what I'm grappling with: Why did you offer me the gum? Surely, you must have known that I was already chewing a piece, as I'm not one to conceal my enjoyment of gum. Second, I have something of a reputation for my frequent offers of gum. You've requested a piece from me on numerous occasions. So you're certainly aware of the fact that I always have a stockpile of many delicious flavors, such as cinnamon, wintergreen, wild berry, and spearmint. Not to mention more unusual flavors, such as watermelon and Black Jack.

But the pieces still don't fit. Was it absentminded social politeness? Perhaps, but you're a shrewd guy. You're not the kind to invite a wine enthusiast to dinner and serve him Two-Buck Chuck. You're smarter than that, and let's be honest, you often have an angle you're playing. The question is: What's the angle?

Perhaps, because I have been so generous with my gum in the past, you felt that it was now your turn to offer a piece to me. Normally, this would be something I would appreciate, but again, we have the problem that I already had a piece of gum going. It seems to me that your strange offer was calculated to elicit a refusal, or perhaps, more sinister, a reciprocal gum offer in the future.

And as it happens, I have recently received a few packs of gum from a friend of mine studying in Iceland. If you tried them, they'd leave you reeling. They did me—no mean feat, for when it comes to gum, I'm fairly jaded.

In the future, I would suggest you come out and ask for gum directly, rather than resorting to subterfuge or mind games to try to wheedle a stick of rare Icelandic gum out of me.

There is one other possible explanation for your gum offer, and it is not a pretty one. You were betraying your low opinion of me. Why else would you offer me Eclipse, for God's sake? Improved flavor or not, I have only sampled that brand to affirm firsthand that their claims of improved taste are premature. I can only imagine that you were letting me know that you thought of me as someone who would enjoy Eclipse. If this is the case, all I can say is that I'm not someone you want as an enemy.

But perhaps I'm overreacting. I think the only way to settle this is with a face-to-face talk. We'll clear the air over a few beers and sticks. If you would just tell me why you offered me that stick of gum, it would certainly put my mind at ease.

Rainer Maria Rilke

Another of my favorite poets -- this is one of his best...

You, You Only, Exist

You, you only, exist.
We pass away, till at last,
our passing is so immense
that you arise: beautiful moment,
in all your suddenness,
arising in love, or enchanted
in the contraction of work.

To you I belong, however time may
wear me away. From you to you
I go commanded. In between
the garland is hanging in chance; but if you
take it up and up and up: look:
all becomes festival!

?!%&*#>! Bears!

I, like much of Chicago, am thoroughly disgusted with yesterday's "effort" against the Panthers. For a defense that all week was yapping like a chihuahua at the mailman, they sure couldn't back it up. A complete failure at all levels. No pressure on Jake Delhomme, single coverage (!) on WR Steve Smith all game after a huge first half, no discernable adjustments at halftime, poor tackling and horrible technique by the secondary -- so much for all the D's talk about being one of the all-time greats. I saw it coming, but couldn't stop myself from picking 'em...

Playoff Picks, Part Deux

3-1 last week, and if Edell Shepard could catch, I'd be 4-0. Of course, if your aunt had a beard, she'd be your uncle, so without further adieu, Playoff Picks, Part Deux

Redskins vs. Seahawks

Redskins have a better D, but the Seahawks' D is good enough to slow down a banged up Clinton Portis and to put enough pressure on Mark Brunell that Santana Moss shouldn't go crazy. That, plus a healthy dose of MVP Shaun Alexander pulls out the W for the 'Hawks. Seahawks to win.

Patriots vs. Broncos

My head is telling me that Tom Brady is 10-0 in the playoffs, and that the Pats are playing their best ball of the year, particularly on the D side. Still... I don't think the Jags presented much of a danger on offense, and given that the Pats' secondary is still banged up, I like Denver's chances. If the Broncos jump out to an early lead, they'll run well enough on the Pats to make it hold up. Says here that the Pats' run is over in Denver. Denver to win.

Steelers vs. Colts

If the Steelers were playing anyone else in the AFC, I'd pick 'em. However, while they'll make it a better game than their 26-7 loss in the RCA Dome earlier this season, the Colts have too much O, and just enough D to win convinvcingly. Colts.

Panthers vs. Da Bears!

The head says, it's the Bears, who haven't made any real post season noise since 1985. The heart says, it's the Bears, your hometown team. You gotta pick 'em. Heart's going to win out here. Won't surprise me if the Panthers win, they've got a better team than they showed in the Bears' 13-3 whuppin' from earlier this year, and Jake Delhomme's postseason record is spectacular so far. However, the Bears' offense is better than the first meeting, and their D has something to prove if they want to be ranked among the best in recent memory. Going with Bears here, and picking all four home teams with the bye to win.

This Just In From Onion Sports!

ESPN Courts Female Viewers With World's Emotionally Strongest Man Competition

September 29, 2005 | Onion Sports

BRISTOL, CT—Sports broadcasting giant ESPN, whose programming has long been a staple among male television viewers of all ages, made its first foray into women's sports programming with the introduction of the World's Emotionally Strongest Man Competition Monday.

The hour-long weekly show, which will run opposite ABC's Monday Night Football, features an international cast of powerfully caring, emotionally resilient, deeply sensitive men pushing themselves and each other to the limit with astounding feats of inner strength in domestic settings around the country.

During the show's premiere, a two-hour special titled "Manhattan Blowout," competitors put their bodies, minds, and spirits to the test in events ranging from the brutal grind of "Enduring Quietly As She Takes Her Hard Day At Work Out On You," to the agility-straining "Throwing A Last-Minute Surprise Party For A Despised Mother-In-Law," to the ultimate combination of strength and finesse, "Helping Her Over The Death Of The Cat That Always Hated You."

"We've always been interested in expanding our brand to involve fans of every possible stripe," said ESPN president George Bodenheimer at the gala WESMC premiere party at the ESPN Zone restaurant in Times Square Monday. "When we looked at our viewers, it was immediately apparent that—figure skating, cheerleading, and gymnastics aside—women were the largest single group we were missing. This new show was designed from the ground up to give them the kind of deep, meaningful competitive experience they don't get from normal sports-entertainment shows."

Over 13 million viewers tuned in for the premiere, which saw Manhattan photographer Barry Peters pull to a strong early lead in overall points with his artful, complaint-free performance in the "Synchronized Cooking And Consolation" event, during which Peters prepared a near-flawless zucchini-pepper ratatouille while effortlessly lifting the spirits of his partner, the challenging and highly unpredictable Christy Ericsson, by convincing her that she was in fact better off without that long-anticipated promotion.

Other strong overall performances were turned in by Martin "There, There" Richards, a graphic designer who remembered to make his wife's beloved tapioca pudding on the anniversary—not of their marriage—but of their first date; Garth "The Embrace" Josephsen, who maintained some form of reassuring but undemanding physical contact with his fiancée for nine consecutive hours; and Ben "Soulmate" Siegel, who made his girlfriend laugh despite her belief that minor weight gain and childlessness were ruining her life.

"It was perfect, honestly," said tear-prone football coach and WESMC host Dick Vermeil, who taped the show's 13 episodes earlier this summer so that he would be free to lead the Kansas City Chiefs without any heart-rending distractions. "We couldn't have asked for a better debut. Even the guys who didn't do as well as they wanted did their honest best, and we had no breakups or severely hurt feelings, despite some relatively large missteps."

According to Vermeil, one competitor, Patrick "Gusher" Johnson, overcorrected a brief moment of thoughtlessness with a hasty and inappropriate marriage proposal, straining his trust almost to the breaking point. He also noted that "Magnanimous" Ver Magnusson, the lone Icelandic entrant, may have tripped himself up with his longtime companion Marta by compensating for his terse nature with an "almost creepy" overabundance of expensive gifts.

Early reviews of the show have been overwhelmingly positive, with the target audience responding precisely as ESPN had hoped.

"WESMC is exactly the kind of thing I've always wanted in a competitive event," said viewer Emma Michaels, who posted her approval on the show's web site. "The way these talented emotional athletes can be so strong for others, bearing up under the crushing weight of sadness, shouldering the burdens of a fully mature relationship, never taking the cop-out of ‘letting a woman down easy,' and never cheating… This is the way these games are meant to be played."

Del Amitri

A great and underappreciated band in the U.S., methinks. The Scottish Matthew Sweet. All these guys have done for the past fifteen years is produce smart, sing-alongable pop/rock songs that have withstood the test of time. Here's a list of my favorites:

Always the Last to Know
Be My Downfall
Cry to Be Found
Don't Come Home Too Soon
Don't I Look Like the Guy You Used To Hate
Drowned on Dry Land
Driving With the Brakes On
Hatful of Rain
It's Never Too Late To be Alone
Kiss This Thing Goodbye
Low Friends in High Places
Move Away Jimmy Blue
Not Where It's At
Nothing Ever Happens
Roll to Me (one of Jen's favorite songs)
Some Other Sucker's Parade
Stone Cold Sober
Tell Her This
The Ones That You Love Lead You Nowhere

Penguin Swing

I happened upon this game some time ago. It's ludicrously simple. Click your mouse to drop the penguin, and then click again to let the Abominable Snowman bat him into orbit. Despite liking penguins almost as much as I like ducks (ask Jen about this), this game is incredibly addictive. It should have been an extra on the "March of the Penguins" DVD. I'll note for the record that no penguins were harmed in the making of this game...

Celebrity Look Alikes?

Bruce Sutter on the left, Larry Bird on the right.

Cubs Add One to Hall of Fame for Second Straight Year

Despite the almost Century of Futility, Cubs reliever turned Cardinals nemesis Bruce Sutter received the call from the Hall of Fame today. While Sutter is as deserving as any reliever out there, particularly for popularizing the split-finger baseball, Goose Gossage, Bert Blyleven, Jim Rice and Andre Dawson were also deserving, in my opinion, but didn't come close. For a team that's truly stunk it up for more than a half century, the Cubs seem to have a solid list of players in the Hall (17, not including managers) -- I'm only including those players with more than five of their good years with the Cubs:

Pete Alexander 1918-1926
Cap Anson 1876-1897
Ernie Banks 1953-1971
Mordecai "Three Finger" Brown 1904-1912, 1916
Frank Chance 1898-1912
Kiki Cuyler 1928-1935
Johnny Evers 1902-1913
Clark Griffith 1893-1900
Gabby Hartnett 1922-1940
Billy Herman 1931-1941
Fergie Jenkins 1966-1973, 1982-1983
King Kelly 1880-1886
Ryne Sandberg 1982-1994, 1996-1997
Bruce Sutter 1976-1980
Joe Tinker 1902-1912, 1916
Billy Williams 1959-1974
Hack Wilson 1926-1931

Later, Corey

The Cubs traded Corey Patterson to the Orioles today, ending the disappointing ride of Patterson, who was hailed by many as a franchise player when he was drafted. The Cubs obtained two minor leaguers in return, 20 year old SS Nate Spears and 23 year old P Carlos Perez. Neither prospect obtained from the Orioles appears to be a blue chipper. Here's hoping Patterson doesn't bust out away from Chicago...

1491 -- The Americas Before Columbus

Just finished 1491 by Charles Mann. The book is a survey of the current theories of archaeology and anthropology addressing what the Americas were like culturally, technologically, and so forth in the years prior to the Columbus. The current theories indicate that Native American civilizations, such as Norte Chico, Inca, Cahokia, the Haudenosaunee and others prior to Columbus was as advanced as other great civilizations in the world, and that the population of the Americas prior to the introduction of European diseases was staggering. While at times Mann seems to take great pains to be politically correct, the research he cites indicates that the Native Americans were far from the "noble savages" typically depicted in American and European history books, and that the Indians dod not simply live in harmony with the land, but in fact molded and shaped the environment to further their plans for its use. It's a fascinating book looking at some revolutionary theories.

Another Hubble Pic

NASA's astronomy picture of the day. The Tarantula Nebula. Tell me where to sign so I can send more of my tax $ to the Hubble, because these pictures are sweet!

NFL Playoff Picks -- Wildcard Weekend

Here they are -- my fearless predictions for this weekend's playoff games:

Redskins v. Bucs

Much as I want a Bears-Skins rematch in the NFC title game, I think these two teams are very similar -- caretaker QBs, good RBs, one stud WR each, and great defenses. I think home field makes the difference in what is essentially a wash, so I'm picking the Bucs.

Jaguars v. Patriots

I want to like the Jags. Alomst as much as I dislike the Pats, for the sole reason I want to see some new blood. But I don't see the Pats giving up the title at home to a team with a QB named "Garrard". Pats to win.

Panthers v. Giants

Giants are pretty banged up on D in the LB corps and the secondary. Despite the fact the Panthers can't seem to run, I like their defense better, and Jake Delhomme is more inconsistently consistent (get that?) than Eli Manning. Panthers.

Steelers v. Bengals

Bengals are a great offense, gambling (but porous defense). Teams split in the regular season. I like the Steelers' balance and experience. Going Steelers here.

St. Thomas Aquinas

Another of the "must-knows" in the pantheon of Christian thought, and another of my favorites... a philosopher's philosopher, as these quotes attest:

A man has free choice to the extent that he is rational.

Beware the man of one book.

Three things are necessary for the salvation of man: to know what he ought to believe; to know what he ought to desire; and to know what he ought to do.

Friendship is the source of the greatest pleasures, and without friends even the most agreeable pursuits become tedious.

The things that we love tell us what we are.

To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible.

Love takes up where knowledge leaves off.

Most men seem to live according to sense rather than reason.

The highest manifestation of life consists in this: that a being governs its own actions. A thing which is always subject to the direction of another is somewhat of a dead thing.

St. Augustine of Hippo

Not only an amazing man, but an unparalleled philosopher, as the following quotes demonstrate:

Faith is to believe what you do not yet see; the reward for this faith is to see what you believe.

God provides the wind, but man must raise the sails.

People travel to wonder at the height of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars; and they pass by themselves without wondering.

You aspire to great things? Begin with little ones.

Miracles are not contrary to nature, but only contrary to what we know about nature.

What does love look like? It has the hands to help others. It has the feet to hasten to the poor and needy. It has eyes to see misery and want. It has the ears to hear the sighs and sorrows of men. That is what love looks like.

Temperance is love surrendering itself wholly to Him who is its object; courage is love bearing all things gladly for the sake of Him who is its object; justice is love serving only Him who is its object, and therefore rightly ruling; prudence is love making wise distinction between what hinders and what helps itself.

2005 Is History

Welcome to 2006! Hope the journey is a good one for all...

Into the Wild / Let Me Go

Finished two of the books in my queue, and would recommend both. Into the Wild, by Jon Krakauer, is the true story of a 24 year-old from an East Coast family with a father who was a NASA scientist. After graduating college, Chris McCandless adopted the name "Alexander Supertramp" and decided to devote the next chunk of his life to wandering the United States with a minimum of material attachments. McCandless is drawn by the idea of testing his limits against nature. After a close call with a flash flood and starvation, he is drawn to the Alaskan Wilderness, where he decides to rough it on Stampede Trail, in the shadow of Denali National Park. Remarkably, McCandless lived for 113 days in the Alaskan bush, eventually dying of starvation, in part due to flooding caused by glacier melts. I found the story mesmerizing, despite the fact that the outcome was never in doubt. While a number of people have criticized McCandless' choices and Krakauer for glorifying what these critics view as a follish death, I find it a thoughtful cautionary tale for the weekend warrior types (and even more experienced survivalists), in the same vein as Krakauer's book Into Thin Air.

Let Me Go by Helga Schnieder, is the true story of an Austrian journalist coming to terms with her estranged mother, who left her family to work for the Nazi SS at Auschwitz/Birkenau during WWII. The book is harrowing, given the fact that no reconciliation is reached between mother and daughter -- the mother is unrepentant and truly believes she was performing a public service of sorts for the Third Reich by exterminating Jews. Particularly disturbing is the fact that her mother understands what she did, yet can't (or refuses) to acknowledge the criminality of her actions. It's a dark moment in the vein of the book "Hitler's Willing Executioners," which theorizes that many Germans were engaged in actions that furthered the Holocuast because they believed in it, rather than simply being "forced into it" by circumstances or fear.

Currently reading -- 1491 -- offering substantial evidence that what we taught about Indian population, history, culture, etc. in school -- is a bunch a bunk...